Preschool Social-Emotional Characteristics by Age

This list was adapted from information from the Kentucky Department of Social Services publications, Louis Bates Ames’ publications, and other sources. Children’s typical characteristics at different ages are summed up below:

THREE-YEAR-OLDS - “friend or enemy?”

• Self-centered
• Like pretending and music
• Swing between being a “big boy/girl” and wanting to be babied
• More easy-going and willing to conform than at two
• Still crave predictable sameness (like the same story each night)
• More secure with a sense of personal identity
• Unable to share well
• Want to be included in everything

FOUR-YEAR-OLDS - “wild and wonderful”

• More self-confident
• Often defiant and testing boundaries
• May be negative
• Enjoy playing with other children
• Can be “bossy”
• Look for adult approval and attention
• May hit or be physically aggressive
• Impatient and easily frustrated
• Often loud, wild, and silly-acting
• Like “potty jokes”
• Make up stories and love to talk

FIVE-YEAR-OLDS - “sunny and serene”

• Quite self-assured and capable
• Like to be helpful and responsible
• Rule-oriented
• Engage in cooperative play but can be quite competitive
• Able to take turns and share
• May have best friends
• Strong sense of identity and pride in accomplishments and possessions
• Like to be close to mother and at home
• May try “stealing” and “lying” (taking desired things that don’t belong to him/her; being dishonest to avoid getting in trouble)